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Lan Quach

About Me I am a model citizen. Loves
  • God
  • love
  • San Diego
Life list
  • Be a PA
  • fine tune my art
  • work in Africa
  • help improve quality of people's lives
  • grow in my love for others
  • fight for what I believe in
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lawrynlawryn (c)

graphics by yours truly

 

 

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Life is a series of choices [
Tuesday

December 30th 2008 @ 9:11pm
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[ mood | contemplative ]

Forget predestination. That just takes responsibility away from us. We are the agents of choice, what we choose to do creates and destroys. Of course there are things out of our control, like the elements and seismic activities ( I once used to track earthquakes worldwide through a geologic site online).

We choose to be happy, or we choose to be sad. We choose to lonely or we choose to be un-lonely, (is that a word?)

I have made some choices lately and I wouldn't go as far as to say that they are good or bad choices, but there's a gradient--better and best. In a lot of ways, I'm still in the process of choosing. Where to attend graduate school? Should I stay on the west coast? Should do the east thing for a while. Should I sell my car? Should I move back home or to a relative's to save money? Should I continue dating someone I'm not crazy about? Should I take a chance on someone new? Should I forgo the whole romance department until I move on to the next phase of my life? Should I sell my stocks or hold on to them?

I suppose my decisions are as imperative to the grand scheme things as Obama's and the house's decisions in the near future, but to me they are.

I saw this video on TED.com, http://www.ted.com/index.php/talks/barry_schwartz_on_the_paradox_of_choice.html
(technology education and design, conference that invites amazing speakers to come and share their thoughts on these three subjects). The speaker Barry Schwartz spoke about the paradox of choice. These days we have too many choices as a result, we are unhappy. It's the number of choices alone, but the fact that having too many choices creates regret. Consequently we are not satisfied with the choices we made. That's food for thought.

LOVE IS THE GREATEST [
Tuesday

August 14th 2007 @ 9:35am
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I was reading my Bible this morning and I came across Proverbs 10:12 "Hatred stirs up dissension but love covers over all wrongs." This scripture reminds me of 1 Peter 4:8 "Above all, love each other deeply, because love covers a multitude of sins". It struck a chord with me because I have been pondering this verse as of late. How love can cover imperfection, faults and mistakes. The call is to love each other which means among many other things forgive each other, protect each other, perfect each other and help each other heal. This is how loving one another can cover for our multitudes of sins.

The commentary note accompanying the verse in Proverbs was also inspiring in itself, it reads, "If you think of love as restricted to the New Testament, Proverbs will surprise you. Here love is the all purpose cure, covering all wrongs. It is worth searching for. It should be expressed openly" (Zondervan, NIV).

I love how they state love is worth searching for, because it really is a treasure in this world. I believe love is the answer to most of the questions on our heart.

God is love,
Lan

pillow talk [
Sunday

August 5th 2007 @ 11:18pm
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If only life could be like a commercial...I always like the Folder's commercial..."the best part of waking up is folder's in a cup", the sun was always shining in the background peaking in the kitchen as a golden glow. If I could live in any commercial, it would probably be the ones from pharmaceutical companies. They always seem so adventurous and lively, someone sailing a boat or biking riding through the fields. Even the one for Valtrex is enticing, it makes you want to have genital herpes because the people who have in the commercial seemed so happy. I suppose that's why the advertising industry makes its bundles, they present a fiction and sell it as truth. We the consumers buy into it trading our truth for their fiction. I suppose it's up to us to make our lives the fullest we can.

Do not smell strangers' perfume! [
Tuesday

July 24th 2007 @ 9:14am
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So my sister sends me a forwarded email, she seldom sends me anything, so I read it. It told stories of men approaching women at gas stations and in parking lots selling perfume. However the ploy was that once the women sniffed the perfume, they passed out...

When I read it, I was like "no way!" because the other day I was going to the Walmart on Aero Dr. this young guy approaches me with an empty red gallon of gas and asked if I could help him out, in return he had some bottles of perfume. Luckily I did have any cash on me or else I would have felt compelled to give him some, I wouldn't have bought the perfume from him though. I thought it was odd how he could just happened to have perfume handy to trade for gas money. After reading the email, I have reason to believe that if I have taken a whiff of his perfume, I could have been at his mercy. So the moral of the story is kids, DO NOT SMELL STRANGERS' PERFUME!

Here is the email )

Yeah! [
Thursday

June 14th 2007 @ 10:40pm
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I took my last final today, I'm so stoked! life = endless possibilities. I feel this sense of freedom that is unbounded. I used to fear what they call "entering the real world", but now I welcome it. The real world has existed for me a long time ago, I'll just have a Bachelor's degree now, which shows that I can function at a college level. The lessons I learned during my time at UCSD can neither be confined to textbooks or the classroom, nor can it be represented by a piece of paper. These past years, I have learned an exponential quantity about life, society, people, politics, economics, spirituality, the darkness of humanity, the goodness in humanity, how to negotiate, and how far my body can endure when I beat it to make it my slave.

What is next for me?

what an exciting question. I am a woman of many passions, interests, and gifts.

Now that I'll have more time, I can pursue these things, and pursue them I must before I enslave myself to another 2-3 years of graduate studies.

things to pursue:
art-painting, creating, building
business-actively trade stocks, learn more, to generate cashflow
medicine-intern at hospital, study the related disciplines
help-volunteer, devote time to causes I believe in
spiritual-continue to seek, learn and grow, to help others do likewise
friends-to devote more time and investment with current friends, to meet new rare ones
family- to serve, protect and love
love- to open my heart to different possibilities
travel- to explore, to experience new territory
health-to strengthen, improve, and build body mass

ahh...the wonder, amazement that is life.

lalala..Life is wonderful [
Tuesday

June 5th 2007 @ 6:05pm
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no matter what things may be going not the way you intended it to, life is indeed wonderful. Lately, I've been thanking God more for the little miracles that happen around me. Driving down the road to school, I'll catch a perfect glimpse of sunlight peering through the trees, and I'll get captured in this moment of beauty. I'll take that beauty with me throughout the day and it becomes part of me. It shines and emanates through my spirit and affects other people I encounter. Boys girls, they can't help but stare and smile. It's hard to explain in words, if you could walk a day in my shoes, you'd forget the sky was gloomy because it is all sunshine here.

yet again... [
Thursday

April 26th 2007 @ 4:05pm
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[ mood | contemplative ]

There's this curvy tall pine tree that stands near the entrance to the Biomedical library. When I see it I think to myself, "Ha! that tree has scoliosis". Scoliosis is a condition where the spine curves, it often appears in young adolescent women. Then today I realized when I saw it again that I had missed the beauty of this magnificant tree. Its curvature nature separates it from all the other straight pine trees one usually encounters. I've realized that I've been looking so hard for imperfections in people and life that it's all I see. I want to change, I want to start seeing the beauty in ugly. I'm going to start with myself.

[
Sunday

April 8th 2007 @ 5:57pm
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As he enters the corridor eyes glance up and quickly withdraw back to their screens, some dare to social reference the others' discreet glances. His shirt is torn and tattered. Unkept frizzy hair pours out from the perimeter of the large bald spot atop his head. Among the twenty-something collegiate students, he sticks out like a sore thumb. it doesn't help that he's 6'5 and lanky. Trying to suppress her preconceived notions that he may be a homeless man, the girl convinces herself that he's just one of those eccentrics, or geniuses that pay little attention to their appearance. She makes up a story in her head to deviate from her judgemental thoughts, perhaps he's a mad scientist of some sort, who lost his wife to cancer and is so bent on finding a cure he neglects everything else in life and spends his days and nights in the medical library. This belief kept her amused until one day his woman showed up. She too was tall, and a taco short of a combination plate. The girl witnessed a token of affection exchanged between the two, a fleeting kiss solicited by the woman. A pair of mad scientist she told herself, there are two peas to every pod!

The story [
Thursday

March 22nd 2007 @ 11:25pm
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"I’m the icing on the cake
I’m the secret ingredient you’re missing
I’m the sidewalk but I’m not complete
And I’m the reason that baby, you’re trippin
Ohh decisions you didn’t make
I’m the chance you chose, not to take."

I love Tristan Prettyman, San Diego native, surfer, singer, girl, amazing talent.

[
Wednesday

March 14th 2007 @ 3:33pm
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Happy pi day.

in other news (light hearted post) [
Monday

March 12th 2007 @ 12:41pm
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Here is a jambalaya of thoughts:

It is 80 something degrees Fahrenheit outside, that is about 26 degrees Celsius. To convert from F to C, first subtract 32 from F and multiply by 5/9.
Leave it up to me to don a turtle neck on such a gorgeous day, I think I take modesty to the extreme. Yes I am a dork.

I want to swim in chlorinated lukewarm water.

I was sitting in class the other day with a doctor lecturing about the abdomen, and how people with gallstones experience a painful cramp in their upper right abdomen after a fatty meal. An alarm rang off in my head because I have had these cramps in the past, once after a meal, though it wasn't fatty. ANywho she said people that fall under these four F's are at risk:
1) Female
2) Forties
3) Fat
4) Flatulent.

It strikes me at odds why I would have gallstones but to make sure I don't I'm going to the doctors and hopefully will get an ultrasound.

Sometimes when I am idle I like to go peruse this website: http://www.foundmagazine.com/

Here is an interesting find I thought was cute:

[
Saturday

March 10th 2007 @ 12:00am
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Today marks the fifth anniversary of my renewal and the washing of all my iniquities known more commonly as baptism. It's nuts how fast time flies, I still remember the details of studying the Bible so vividly. The amazement, joy, sadness, frustration and relief from learning about Jesus, His love for me and what that meant for my life. If there was one great decision in my life that I could never take back, it would be the one to become a Christ follower, everything else fades in comparison.

A lot has already happened this year, my family moved to a new house, I moved out to a friend's house, switched to a new church--Ranchland, among sadder events I have a great aunt afflicted with terminal cancer. If you ever pray, please pray for her.

A lot more will happen this year as I finish up my minor and finally graduate.

Lately through a series of events and compromises, I found this truth to be self evident:I am a morally inept person, that is try as I will, I cannot be righteous on my own accord. I am a prideful, deceitful, impatient, impure, lazy, and selfish person at heart. Whenever I try to do good evil is right there waiting for me. However I do realize that this is a perfect place to be at, to be able to recognize that without God I am an amoral person. This state of spiritual bankruptness has forced me to turn to God and admit that I am sinner. That I need forgiveness because I cannot be righteous on my own strength, that I need His power and mercy to aid me and pick me up each time I fall and to lead me to be more like Jesus. Grace motivates me, not guilt, not caring what other people think (though I have a hard time with both the latter and the former). The beauty of the cross is that it affords me a second chance when I messup and in this fallen world, I have and will. My wickedness is already paid for by Christ's death and the resurrection is one of the many proofs of that. Had Jesus made all these promises about the redemption of people through his blood shed through his underserved death, and not resurrected, then everything is a sham and Christians are to be pitied most among all men. But through the fact of the resurrection and there are 500 eyewitnesses that can atest to this, baptism is not just a quick dip under water, it has power and can bring forth a renewal, a rebirth. This is the power of the resurrection, without this understanding, Easter is just another cute tradition.

[
Sunday

February 25th 2007 @ 1:34pm
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She was a treasure
and a jewel
precious
priceless
yet bought at a price

Somewhere along the lines
She forget her worth
her royal inheritance
all that was poured out for her

Her King died for her
declared His undying love
pledged that He would never leave her
but over time she forgot
so she felt so empty and alone

Searching and seeking for that someone
or something that would fill her up
she was found wanting
So she surrendered and
it was then she remembered
Her first love

humble, humiliated, she came crawling
back to the One who could save her
again and again, every time she
fell.

Is this love? This is love. [
Sunday

February 11th 2007 @ 4:52pm
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Archaeologist recently dug up what appears to be a young couple embracing in Italy.

"The pair from the Neolithic period were discovered outside Mantua, about 40km (25 miles) south of Verona.

The pair, almost certainly a man and a woman, are thought to have died young as their teeth were mostly intact, said chief archaeologist Elena Menotti.The burial site was discovered on Monday during construction work for a factory building.

"It's an extraordinary case," said Ms Menotti. "There has not been a double burial found in the Neolithic period, much less two people hugging - and they really are hugging," she told Reuters news agency.

Flint tools, including arrowheads and a knife, were also found alongside the couple. Scientists will now study the skeletons and artifacts to work out how and when the two people died, Ms Menotti said.

"I must say that when we discovered it, we all became very excited," she said.

"I've been doing this job for 25 years. I've done digs at Pompeii, all the famous sites, but I've never been so moved because this is the discovery of something special," she said.
locked in an embrace.

The pair from the Neolithic period were discovered outside Mantua, about 40km (25 miles) south of Verona.

The pair, almost certainly a man and a woman, are thought to have died young as their teeth were mostly intact, said chief archaeologist Elena Menotti.

" -BBC News

yoke is easy, burden light? [
Monday

February 5th 2007 @ 2:32pm
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Jesus says "Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light."(Matt 11:28-30)

in the message Bible this passage reads:

"Are you tired? Worn out? Burned out on religion? Come to me. Get away with me and you'll recover your life. I'll show you how to take a real rest. Walk with me and work with me—watch how I do it. Learn the unforced rhythms of grace. I won't lay anything heavy or ill-fitting on you. Keep company with me and you'll learn to live freely and lightly."


Yokes are harnesses that join two oxen together in order to pull a heavy load, or to plow the field. Why would Jesus state that his yoke is easy and his burden is light. It seems to many that walking with Jesus is a burdensome task. Aren't there all these rules to follow? You know those do's and don'ts and if you break one you're in sin. And also isn't there that burden of knowing the responsibility you have to bear as a person who follows Jesus, the persecution, the exclusion, and the criticisms when you take a stand for something or if you ever stumble. Why would Jesus say his burden is light when we are yoked with him, when we walk right next to him two- by two like oxen do?

That is because when we truly are yoked with Jesus, we finally understand what it is like to be an oxen paired with another oxen. Except of the two oxen, we are the weaker one, with the lighter side of the yoke to bear. Yokes are unbalanced, the heaver side goes to the strong oxen whereas the lighter side goes to the weaker oxen. The load for the weaker ox is less while the stronger ox has more weight to pull. Until you really walk with Jesus not just watching from the sidelines will you really feel a lighter burden, one that is shouldered mostly on Him. Then following Jesus will not be be such a chore, it will be a joy, a rest compared to living without Him. If you are those that he seeks, the tired, worn out, those burnt out on religion , come to Him, he's waiting on you.

Goals * Visions * Dreams 2007 [
Monday

January 1st 2007 @ 2:29pm
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With the beginning of the new year, I have contemplating my goals or resolutions, if you will, for the upcoming year. I find that writing them down helps me to reiterate and to reflect on them from time to time. Perhaps in sharing them you may hold me accountable. Alli te va:

- Stay faithful to God during the next year
- Spend more quality time in word and prayer daily
- love people deeper
- forgive people quicker
- not give up so easily on friendships
- to be on time
- to grow in purity : heart, soul, and mind.
- work out at least once a week
- to lift 100 lbs off the ground to a height of 2 feet
- forgive and move on from past relationship
- speak more of positive things than negative
- make progressive steps toward PA goals and working in Africa
- not give up on Faith, love or life
- make my money multiply
- to also focus on goals made in Singapore (1. to help a woman at UCSD become a Christian
2. To build a best friendship with younger sister 3. To be able to preach and teach the Bible in Vietnamese 4. To constantly humble myself and consider others better than myself 5. To come back to Singapore in 5 years and read these goals 6. To be dating a man of God.)

As I get older [
Wednesday

December 13th 2006 @ 6:38pm
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There's a saying I found to be true, "when you're young, the days seem long and the years go by slower, when you're older the days still seem long but the years go by faster". Not that I have merited the status of being "old", but I am a lot older than I was when I was younger. Old and young can't be defined by exact numbers rather they are ordinal--characterized by scale values. I sit here at the ripe age of 22, wondering where did the last four years of my life go? It flew by before me, like a bullet.


After a while of living in this world, you notice patterns in life, situations, weather, economy and in people. People become extremely predictable in certain situations. You can even guess what they will say before they say it. You then realized people will be people. You admit to yourself that you can't change everyone, some people like where they are, they are content, or afraid of moving out of their comfort zone. Only experience can make them see otherwise. Four years ago my naïveté gave me the ambition of saving the world, making a global difference. Now I see it on a more local scale, if I could just _____ one life, or just one soul, it would be worth all the sweat and tears. It's not that I have reduced my goals, I have merely refined them. And somewhere as those lines I lost my idealism. I'm not sure if it's a bad thing but it can make me stale.

the Mundane [
Friday

November 17th 2006 @ 2:05pm
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Last night, I was stricken with boredom. So I pleaded with a friend's whose house's paint is still drying to let me come over. And over I did come with my sister's SCRAMBLE board game. After a couple hours of musing over wooden squares with letters on them, I head back home in the thickest of fog. Pulled over to park around and the corner, reversed and BAM! Hit the car behind me and it's alarm came on. It's definitely not the first time, but this one was quite avoidable I thought. So I looked for a piece of paper, found a dentist's bill and wrote an apology note along with my insurance info. on its back. I checked the damage, there was none, but still left the note anyway. I was so calm about, quite strange--I wasn't trembling or scared as I would have been before. This passage rang inside of me:


The LORD is my light and my salvation—
whom shall I fear?
The LORD is the stronghold of my life—
of whom shall I be afraid?
-Psalm 27:1

Honestly, they can try to get money from me, in that case my insurance will cover it. My dad can get upset with me, but his anger too is temporary. It's crazy but I think I'm growing up.

[
Monday

October 23rd 2006 @ 10:55am
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I read from this interview from a friend's blog and found it again on the net. I hope it inspires you as it did me. It was a interview with Rick Warren, the author of the purpose driven life.

People ask me, What is the purpose of life? And I respond, In a nutshell, life is preparation for eternity. We were made to last forever, and God wants us to be with Him in Heaven. One day my heart is going to stop, and that will be the end of my body - but not the end of me. I may live 60 to 100 years on earth, but I am going to spend trillion of years in eternity. This is the warm-up act, the dress rehearsal. God wants us to practice on earth what we will do forever in eternity. We were made by God and for God, and until you figure that out, life isn't going to make sense.

Life is a series of problems: Either you are in one now, you're just coming out of one or you're getting ready to go into another one. The reason for this is that God is more interested in your character than your comfort. God is more interested in making your life holy than He is in making your life happy. We can be reasonably happy here on earth, but that's not the goal of life: The goal is to grow in character, In Christ-likeness.

This past year has been the greatest year of my life but also the toughest, with my wife, Kay, getting cancer. I used to think that life was hills and valleys - you go through a dark time, then you got to the mountaintop, back and forth. I don't believe that anymore. Rather than life being hills and valleys, I believ'e that it's kind of like two rails on a railroad track, and at all times you have something good and something bad in your life. No matter how good things are in your life, there is always something bad that needs to be worked on.

And no matter how bad things are in your life, there is always something good you can thank God for. You can focus on your purposes, or you can focus on your problems. If you focus on your problems, you're going into self-centeredness, "which is my problem, my issues, my pain."

But one of the easiest ways to get rid of pain is to get your focus off yourself and onto God and others.

We discovered quickly that in spite of the prayers of hundreds of thousands of people, God was not going to heal Kay or make it easy for her. It has been very difficult for her, and yet God has strengthened her character, given her a ministry of helping other people, given her a testimony, drawn her closer to Him and to people...You have to learn to deal with both the good and the bad of life.

Actually, sometimes learning to deal with the good is harder. For instance, this past year, all of a sudden, when the book sold 15 million copies, it made me instanfly very wealthy. It also brought a lot of notoriety that I had never had to deal with before.

I don't think God gives you money or notoriety for you to own ego or for you to live a life of ease. So I began to ask God what He wanted me to do with this money, notoriety and influence. He gave me two different passages that helped me decide what to do, Corinthians 9 and Psalm 72.

First, in spite of all the money coming in, we would not change our lifestyle one bit. We made no major purchases. Second, about midway through last year, I stopped taking a salary from the church. Third, we set up foundations to fund an initiative we call The Peace Plan - to plant churches, equip leaders, assist the poor, care for the sick, and educate the next generation. Fourth, I added up all that the church had paid me in the 24 years since I started the church, and I gave it all back. It was liberating to be able to serve God for free.

We need to ask ourselves: Am I going to live for possessions? Popularity? Am I going to be driven by pressures? Guilt? Bitterness? Materialism? Or am I going to be driven by God's purposes (for my life)?

When I get up in the morning, I sit on the side of my bed and say, God, if I don't get anything else done today, I want to know You more and love You better...God didn't put me on earth just to fulfil a to-do list. He's more interested in what I am than what I do. That's why we're called human beings, not human doings.

[
Saturday

October 21st 2006 @ 3:01pm
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I'm getting back into web design, I want a more professional site to display my work, but art, photography and furniture. This will be the domain address : http://www.freewebs.com/simplylan/

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